this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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