i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
i think im in europe. pls send help
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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