Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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