Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
