no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
