You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
