Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
