I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
