That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize