You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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