Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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