no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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