Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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