When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
