I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize