hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
