oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
