She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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