I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
