even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
