I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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