I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
