I must be too annoying 4 u.
my phone needs a breathalizer
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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