so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
