I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize
