big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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