He is such a slut. More and more my type.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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