You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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