I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
