Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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