your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
