Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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