just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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