Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
