I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
