Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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