Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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