you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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