Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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