I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I have demons in me.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize