it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Tornado booty call.. dedication
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
