My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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