the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
