I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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