don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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