So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize