Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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