it's too hot outside to masturbate.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
