So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize