I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
