Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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